Awfully quiet over there

Cooper, the sassy and slightly out of control Pomeranian that lives with me is rarely still when I am at home. She patiently waits at the gate of the kitchen when I am eating. Longing for that moment that I step over the gate. When that time comes, she jumps around as if she has not seen me in weeks let alone the fact that she has been watching me intently as I eat every last morsel of my meal. When I am working she entertains herself by flipping toys up into the air over and over again or jumping on the couch, off the couch, on the couch, off the couch, on the couch, pause to look outside………….that’s enough, off the couch, on the couch, you get the drift.

Tonight, I am minding my own business, working at the kitchen table as my dinner is cooking. Look at that, all eating at home and stuff. Anyway, Pooper is being a little too quiet, but I decide to savor the rare moment and get just a smidge more work done. I suddenly hear her paws on the cabinet and I holler out “NO!” Those cabinets are 1 year old and expensive dang it! Her paws drag down the side. A crash. A splash.

In my “disciplining”, it scared her back paws out from under her, she slid down the side of the cupboard and took the lanyard attached to my keys with her. The keys that were under the container of Tide detergent. AH NUTS!

It was everywhere. Her food and water bowls, a huge mound on the floor, and I do not know if you have noticed, but she has a lot of hair. Every time she sneezed, more of it shook off of her. Me and my mad parenting skills splashed some water on her face and threw (read: lightly put) her into her cage. I vacuumed and scrubbed the floor, threw out the old dishes and set out new ones, started a load of laundry (I mean, why not?), attempted to wash the front half of Coop again, and gave her a new toy for her pain and suffering.

When the Tide had settled, I smell something burning. SHOOT! Dinner was a little too over cooked to eat. After all of that, Spaghetti-o’s are just fine, and Cooper smells really good.

Maybe this post should be titled: Reason 254 - Why I Should Never Have Children.